Evening Refreshment

एक नौजवान ने एक बुजुर्ग से

पूछा :बाबा बताएं जब एक दिन
दुनिया से जाना है तो फिर लोग पैसो के पीछे
क्यों भागते हैं ?.
.
जब जमीन जायदाद जेवर यहीं रह
जाते हैं तो लोग
इनको अपनी जिन्दगी क्यों बनाते हैं ??.
.
जब रिश्ते निभाने
की बारी आती है तो दोस्त
ही दुश्मनी क्यों निभाते
हैं ??.
.
बुजुर्ग ने गौर से तीनों सवाल सुने और
अपनी जेब में हाथ डाला....
.
नौजवान बड़े गौर से सब देख रहा था...फिर
उस बुज़ुर्ग ने
अपनी जेब से माचिस
की डिब्बी निकली....
.
माचिस की डब्बी से तीन
तीलियाँ निकाली.
.
दो तीलियाँ उसने उस लड़के की तरफ
फेंक दी...
एक उसके दायें में और एक बायीं तरफ....
.
और एक तीली को आधा तोड़
कर उपर वाला भाग फेंक दिया...लड़का ये
सब बड़े गौर से देख
रहा था.
.
इसके बाद बाबा ने बची हुई
तीली के नीचे वाले भाग
को नुकीला बनाया...और आसमान
की तरफ देखा....
.
लड़के
की जिज्ञासा बढ़ती जा रही थी...
.
बाबा ने नुकीला हिस्सा अपने मुँह में
डाला और
अपने दांत कुरेदते हुए बोले -.
.
मुझे क्या मालूम उल्लू के पट्ठे...
हा हा हा    

Newton & Sultan Rahi

Once, Newton came to Pakistan and watched a few Lollywood movies that had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done.

In the movies of Sultan Rahi, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes

1) Sultan Rahi has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Sultan Rahi is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured!
Long Live Sultan Rahi!

2) In another movie, Sultan Rahi is confronted with 3 gangsters. Sultan Rahi has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.

3) Sultan Rahi is chased by a gangster. Sultan Rahi has a revolver but no bullets in it. Guess what he does. Nah? Not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Sultan Rahi opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang... the gangster dies...

This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of physics. The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed. Oops, not so fast!

The 'climax' finally arrives.

Sultan Rahi gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Sultan Rahi can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Sultan Rahi has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax. ( Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible?) Sultan Rahi suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.

Newton commits suicide...